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Writer's pictureljellis57

The Birds and The Bees

Updated: May 15, 2023


San Joaquin Valley, California


Even though I don’t know at this time the man my cousin will someday marry, I have already included him in my prayers. Understanding Kinsey will be a never-ending challenge for the gentleman.


There is the “Twice Her Age Kinsey”.


“Honestly Scott, Ripley took too much credit. It was Emerson’s ‘Nature’ with its belief in the mystical unity of the universe that led to transcendentalism."


There is the “Half Her Age Kinsey”.


“Honestly Scott, you couldn’t see where I licked my finger and wrote a big letter K in the frosting? That was clearly my piece of chocolate cake.”


Then there is “Befitting Age Kinsey”.


“Honestly Scott, why do you insist on signing your first AND last name to all of Madison’s letters? Just how many Scotts does this girl know?”


On any given day and on any given topic, I am never positive which Kinsey I will be speaking to. So, with the town hall dance a few days away, I’m uncertain if my concerns for my cousin are warranted. I’m under the impression she was raised as a guarded object in order to confirm the Furlongs’ good parenting skills and not as a daughter in need of guidance. Other than the casual mention of Sean Willowby’s kissing lessons, I believe Kinsey’s experiences are limited. Will “Twice Her Age Kinsey” be present at the dance or should I be worried that “Half Her Age Kinsey” attends and will be taken advantage of due to her naïve outlook of knights in shining white armor?


Keeping an eye on my cousin and Teresa the entire evening will be damn near impossible. Usually, it’s Johnny with the opinion on who is courting Teresa but I’m positive the night of the dance Kinsey will be the focus of his biased viewpoints. The subtle investigation of the facts will be the key to my avoiding the label of an over-protective “goof”.

~ S.


Scott decided if Kinsey shared any stories regarding her past suitors it would be with Teresa. Good fortune blessed the investigator when he discovered his person of interest all alone enjoying the afternoon sun while catching up on her latest reading. Scott soon learned good fortune could be fleeting.


“Teresa, do you have a moment? I need to ask you something?”


Closing her book, Teresa smiled brightly. “Of course, Scott. What is it?”


“It has to do with Kinsey. I was wondering if she has shared any stories with you regarding past…well…you know...gentlemen she may have been close to…more than friends…what I mean is…a beau…maybe two….”


Scott’s words trailed off as he watched Teresa’s sunny smile transform into a scowl. Re-opening her book, Teresa began to quietly read.


Totally forgetting the “Female Code of Non-Disclosure”, Scott had misjudged his approach and played his hand too soon.


“Now Teresa, I think I have a right to know Kinsey’s experiences with courting and the possibility of an intimate relationship in her past, or if she’s rather ignorant of what a man may intend…”


“Scott Lancer! Shame on you! I will not sit here and tolerate your prying regarding your cousin’s personal life or her past romances. Simply put, it’s none of your business.”


“I disagree Teresa. I need to be aware if William Jenkins tries to charm Kinsey to some haystack in a barn will my little cousin possess enough common sense to realize the objective is not to feed the cows!”


Snapping her book shut, Teresa rose, favored Scott one more disgusted look and walked away.


“That went well.”


When Johnny made the comment that Jenkins had a different girl on his arm every week, Scott had to admit his younger brother wasn’t far from the truth. William was also a Harvard lad the same years Scott had attended. His recollection of Doc Jenkins’ boy was vague but William’s reputation of making many a girl smile did stick in Scott’s memory. He was surprised to learn William was not following in his father’s footsteps as a doctor but instead worked as the editor of the Green River Gazette. Scott guessed William was equally surprised to hear the Boston Lancer landed on a ranch.


Scott decided it was best to have a mature heart-to-heart talk with Kinsey. He believed being honest and upfront would produce the best results. His first guess to where Kinsey may be was correct, the horse stable. She was nearing the end of her month long exile from riding her beloved mare. He knew his little cousin felt having her riding privileges suspended was more painful than the spanking his father gave her.


Scott watched Kinsey lovingly brush the mare. “Few more days to go.”


“Five days, three hours, and twenty-two minutes. I hope I haven’t forgotten how to ride.”


“I hope you haven’t forgotten Murdoch’s talk.”


Scott picked up a second brush and joined Kinsey in brushing the mare. “Looking forward to the dance?’


“I am.”


“I guess you didn’t attend many of these in Melbourne.”


“No. It required dancing.”


“Right.”


The brushing continued.

“I’m sure there were other social events you attended…you know…to meet people…your age.”


Kinsey’s brushing slowed slightly as she quickly glanced up at her cousin. “You experienced what my social life was like Scott. If I remember correctly it took less than a day for your photograph to land on the front page of the Melbourne Morning Call.”


Scott smiled as he recalled the chaos of reporters and photographers following Kinsey’s every move. It seemed like a long time ago. “So I guess there were limited…situations…for you to have a more…I mean, less hectic…setting…for conversations…with your friends…girlfriends…possibly…a few young men?”


Kinsey raised an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t define the girls that traveled in my circle as friends. Self-focused young ladies can be rather devious to their so-called friends.”


“I’m sorry to hear that Freckles.”


“Don’t be. I was one of them.”


“And now you’re not.”


The chestnut mare continued to enjoy the cousins’ conversation.


“You know Kinsey, young men can be…I wouldn’t say devious…perhaps their intentions at first are admirable…but then…well…”


An undetected smirk played across Kinsey’s face.


“What are you trying to say, Scott?”

“Kinsey, sometimes a young man, when with a young lady, has good intentions in the beginning but then one moment leads to another…”


“And he finds himself climbing out her bedroom window as her father bangs on the door?"


Scott, rubbing the back of his head, lowered his gaze. “There would be that possibility, yes.”


“Scott, are you trying to tell me about the birds and the bees?”


Silence.


“Go ahead Kinsey, say it.”


“Scott, you are an over-protective goof.” Grabbing the front of his shirt, Kinsey pulled her older cousin down to her height to plant a kiss on his cheek. “And I love you for it.”


Watching his cousin bound out the barn door, Scott turned to the chestnut mare and smiled.


“That went well.”

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