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Writer's pictureljellis57

Domestic Skills

Updated: May 13, 2023



San Joaquin Valley, California


My younger brother is a complicated combination of emotions and convictions. Over time I have untangled some of the mysteries of his personality, however, with other aspects of his character, it continues to be a challenge. Johnny’s challenge lately has been the twists and turns in Kinsey’s psyche.


“Boston, can I talk to you?”


“Yes, and you’ll find me a more agreeable conservationist if you help unload this wagon.”


“Maybe it’s best you see what I want to talk to you about.”


“Fine. I’ll be a more agreeable observer once you help unload this wagon.”


“You best see this now.”


“Johnny…”


“Kinsey’s in the kitchen.”


“All right and I could use a little help here.”


Observing that Johnny wasn’t moving, Scott set down the sack of grain and pushed his hat back. “So, Kinsey’s in the kitchen and…?”


Johnny motioned for his brother to follow. Rolling his eyes, Scott removed his gloves, tossed them in the back of the wagon and with a wave of his arm indicated, “Let’s go.”


The first thing Scott noticed when entering the kitchen was the fine white powder that not only covered every flat surface but also created a slight haze in the air. Running his finger over a counter, he squinted to examine the substance a bit closer.


Flour.


The inspector’s attention then focused on a horrified Maria and a dumbfounded Johnny, both standing and staring across the room. Scott followed their gaze, which led him to his cousin who was covered in white dust and up to her elbows in bread dough.


Displaying a glop of sticky, oozing dough, Kinsey proudly announced, “I’m baking bread!”


Scott nodded, smiled, slowly walked over to Maria and leaned down so he could speak quietly.

“Maria.”


“Si?”


“It appears there is more flour on Kinsey than in the bread.”


“Si.”


“Should that be happening?”


“Let me say this to you, Señor Scott. When the time comes find nuestra niña a man who is kind. A man who is patient. A man who is gentle.”


“A man who doesn’t eat?”


“Si.”


“Maria, would it be helpful if Johnny and I removed Kinsey from the kitchen?”


Maria crossed herself, placed her hand on her heart and nodded.


Scott signaled for Johnny to gather up Kinsey and get her out of the way.


Johnny hesitated on choosing Kinsey’s least floured area, finally settling on the small of her back for his hand to guide her towards the Great Room. “We need to talk to you darlin’.”


“Not now Johnny. Can’t you see I’m helping?”


“I’m tryin’ but honestly, it ain’t comin’ into focus.”


The boys discovered Murdoch taking inventory of his liquor cabinet in their first choice for a quiet location. Their father looked up in time to spy Johnny pushing something white out of the room with his oldest son following close behind.


“Scott!”


Scott reappeared. “Sir?”


“Who was with Johnny?”


“I believe it was the Ghost of the Hacienda. Let me check.”


As his oldest disappeared Murdoch bellowed.


“SCOTT!”


“Sir?”


“Are you aware I’m missing a bottle of champagne?”


“There is a very good possibility I might be aware.”


Watching his son disappear once again, the patriarch accepted the fate of the champagne as a casualty of his one week stay in Sacramento.


Arriving at the courtyard Scott witnessed Johnny slapping Kinsey with his hat as clouds of flour floated through the air.


“Johnny! STOP IT! That’s so annoying.”


Placing his thumb and index finger to his mouth, Scott let out a loud whistle.


Silence.


“Let’s sit down”


Not certain where to begin, Scott started out with what he thought was an easy question. “Kinsey, what inspired you to bake today?”


“Teresa asked if I would help Maria in the kitchen while she was gone. I thought what an extraordinary opportunity. No one has ever asked me to help in a kitchen before.”


Johnny raised his eyebrows.


“Wait. Half-pint, are you telling me you have never set foot in a kitchen?”


“Well, no one has ever suggested it until now.”


“What about that three-layer chocolate cake you said you would bake? Little girl, was that a lie?”


“I claimed that during our poker game. It’s called a BLUFF. It was a perfectly acceptable statement.”


“Scott, I can’t believe this.”


Kinsey crossed her arms. “Tell me, Johnny, what is so unbelievable?”


“Well, you’re a female. And that’s what females do. They go in the kitchen and bake bread and cook food…because…that’s what females are supposed to do.”


Scott observed Kinsey’s eyes narrowing and her mouth drawing a straight line. “Little brother, I think perhaps…”


Johnny interrupted. “And when they aren’t cooking and baking…they clean things that…you know…are dirty.”


Sighing, Scott sat back and permitted Johnny to keep digging his hole.


“And since you’re a female I find it hard to believe you don’t know things females are supposed to know.”


Johnny looked at his brother for a nod of approval.


“Little brother, why don’t you add…and females obey their husbands at all times…to your list. That should put the icing on your three-layer cake…so to speak.”


Johnny finally noticed a chill in the air as he made eye contact with Scott’s cousin.


“John, are you questioning my domestic skills?”


“Well, darlin’ if that means you can’t cook then I guess I am.”


“I see. Scott, I will be retiring to my room to freshen up.”


Watching Kinsey abruptly stand and leave, Johnny exhaled deeply. “I think I said something wrong.”


“I think you didn’t say anything right.”


Scott firmly believed when opportunity knocks one should open the door and invite it in. “Johnny, let me offer you this proposal. I will go talk to Kinsey and fix the last 10 minutes of your insightful conversation if you take responsibility for the missing champagne. Take your time before answering.”


“Now,” Scott thought, “Let’s see how hard he has fallen for his independent and adventurous young lady.”


The picnic send-off for Sawyer turned out to be more expensive than my brother had anticipated. He should have the bottle of champagne paid off in about a month.

This evening Maria will be teaching Kinsey the fine art of the perfect three-layer chocolate cake. Johnny and I have been invited as spectators and judges.

~ S.

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